That B*tch Bakes … BBQ Sauce!
The Quintessentially American Concoction That's Hard to Get Right
Welcome back to "That B*tch Bakes,” in which I share with you recipes, witty asides, and my baking adventures.
Everyone has a BBQ sauce recipe in their family or repertoire, am I right? I tried for years to achieve the right balance of ingredients and texture but never quite hit it. At different tries, I found different reasons to not be satisfied with the end product. Runny. Too hot/spicy. Not hot/spicy enough. Not sweet enough. Not tangy enough. Too tomato-y. For me, the secret is fourfold:
Balance my ingredients. BBQ sauce isn't about one dominant flavor but an umami harmony of sweet/sour/bitter/salty ingredients, each used in moderation.
Small amounts of xanthum gum, pectin, gelatin, and/or cornstarch during the simmer stage if my sauce feels too thin after it reaches boil;
It's absolutely crucial to rest the sauce to room temp before refrigeration; and
It's just as critical to refrigerate the concoction at least 8 hrs, but best up to 24 hrs before serving.
I'm not saying my sauce is the best ever made. How can I when so many chefs in so many regions offer so many incredible BBQ sauces? It is, though, my favorite.
B*tch BBQ Sauce
(I bake by mass/weight. Use this handy site to make mass-to-volume conversions. If you can afford it and see yourself getting as b*tchy about baking as I’ve gotten, buy a low-end digital scale. So worth it.)
Prep Time: 20 min | Cook Time: 25 min | Total Time: 45 min | Yield: 1 16oz Mason Jar of BBQ Goodness
EQUIPMENT
Med Saucepan
Whisk
Mason Jar or other airtight container, depending on how long you want to store
INGREDIENTS (a veritable witch’s potion!)
½ sweet onion (diced super fine—if you think it's too fine, it prolly ain't)
6oz tomato paste
2 cloves garlic (minced fine)
2-½C water
½C brown sugar, lightly packed
½C honey
¼C apple cider vinegar
2T butter
2T lemon juice
2T Worcestershire sauce
2T Dijon mustard
1T plus 1t chili powder
2t cracked black pepper
2t salt
1t ground coriander
¼t Ancho Chile Powder
¼t Chipotle Powder
xanthum gum, pectin, gelatin, and/or cornstarch (if needed to shore up thickness)
DIRECTIONS
In med saucepan, melt butter on med-hi heat. Add onions and garlic and cook, stirring frequently, till onions are translucent and soft. About 2-4 min.
Whisk remaining ingredients in saucepan, stirring frequently, till sauce just comes to boil. Reduce heat to med-lo and simmer 20-25 min. (If sauce feels thin, add small amount of xanthum, pectin, gelatin, and/or cornstarch to the simmer stage, till you hit the desired consistency.)
Kill heat and allow sauce to cool to nearly room temp.
Refrigerate overnight (8-24 hrs). Sauce will last 2 weeks in fridge, in tightly sealed jar. Or, you can use a canning process to sterilize mason jars and store indefinitely. Who knows? Maybe in 100 years, some kids escaping an abusive West Texas prison camp will find your mason jars of BBQ Sauce under a rotting overturned rowboat in a dried lake bed and drink that Sploosh to preserve their lives till they can bring the prison-camp villains to justice. Who knows? (All apologies to Louis Sachar and his inventive tale, Holes.)
I do not recommend freezing this good potion. Make it when you need it.
There you have it—it’s the Fourth of July Holiday! Get b*tchy with some good-time barbecue!