Being trans is not about fooling anyone, especially ourselves. To pass is to strut past gender-binary roadblocks, to live as ourselves.

I took 50 years to realize I'm trans. Every day since my surgery two years ago has been a continued blossoming.

We Don't Need Surgery to be Trans, but for Some of Us, It's Euphoria

What's beyond a ritual, if we let it be so, is to embrace "the other" as huggable.

Trans or not, marriage is a yin and yang dance in which the shape of one's giving defines the other's taking.